APPRECIATE THE J.O.B.

APPRECIATE THE J.O.B.

You may have a splendid career or a J.O.B. Either way, there are always good people to interact with and oinker boinkers. It must be some type of universal, unavoidable oxy-moron to keep the world spinning in the right direction, because there is always at least one oinker boinker in the world of the real job.
One may be stressed out and frustrated by their job, but it truly can always be worse. If your health is good be thankful for that. If your family is wonderful be ever so thankful for that. If there are friends and relatives in your life that don’t wreak havoc on your sanity, but are helpful and supportive, this is another grand blessing, so appreciate it.
If your job isn’t what it should be for you, it’s your life, it’s your job and you are completely responsible for the decisions that you have made to acquire your current status.
No amount of complaints or rationalization justifies not pursuing change if you so desire and are not satisfied. The point is to be glad for what you have while you have it. If you’re content, that’s great. If you’re not, the responsibility to channel desire and pursue a better future lies with you. It can absolutely be done by anyone with the courage to hop out of the comfort zone and seek, investigate, research and strive for a new life. Remember though life is not always greener on the other side.
Don’t waste the precious moments along the way.
Be grateful for all the things that you have even if the job isn’t one of them. Appreciate all good things in your life even when other effects are not so good. There are life situations that can make any job look good no matter what the situation. Go forth in peace and sanity.

APPRECIATE THE J.O.B.

KIDS, ARE YOU KIDDING?

Kids’, Are You Kidding?

A child is never an oinker boinker, unless of course, they are raised that way and grow up to be one. They do, without a doubt, have oinker boinker moments though.

From the moment they were born my children were dearly missed every single moment we were apart. Whether at daycare or grandparents house, school or the first slumber party, wherever they were they were missed and anxious anticipation and excitement surrounded the moments prior to having them with me again. Not every day, but many. When picked up mere seconds into the reunion experience my thoughts turn to: ‘What was I thinking? Are they fighting again? Making me crazy, over yes, I believe today it is once again the same thing, nothing.’ There must be a great big bold S for SUCKER tattooed squarely in the center of my forehead because it’s a situation that must necessitate recurring for a lifetime. Never learning, I’m always anxious and excited to see them until they get in the car and open their mouths.

Of course, when they’re babies they are sweet and lovable. An added bonus is getting to love them while watching the sun come up, and go down, and come up again, etc. Sunsets and sunrises are beautiful even without sleep for days. Don’t forget the diaper experience that too, is another grand occurrence. How does something so small manage bodily functions like that? Since we obviously weren’t sleeping they must run off while we’re taking a shower and eat I don’t know what. That being said, the phenomenal thing about babies is the firsts. The first time grabbing your finger with their tiny hands, smiling and sitting up. Next they’re crawling, standing and walking, well actually waddling. I loved the padding on all sharp corners. The coffee table, end tables and fireplace to name a few, all were stunningly decorated with that lovely gray foam type padding. The drawer and door safety locks were great fun as well. Making the otherwise boring and mundane task of getting to the things you use every day, challenging and exciting. Exhaustion aside, these things win them a permanent place, which goes beyond the descriptive word, in the hearts of their parents. Revel in those moments because they slip away so fast. The very last bottle of the youngest child and the day they lost their waddle was achingly sad for me. If you have children no doubt you get it.

Then there is that first word which is always anxiously anticipated by all parents. Why? We really should appreciate what we have. Smiling and crawling are good things aren’t they? Why can’t we just be content with that? First comes one word, then two. Next there are small sentences, and words that even sailors shouldn’t say or remarks that make one want to lock them in their rooms for life. But sitting in a comfy chair and reading (and re-reading) them their favorite story is magnificently magical. There are no real words for that feeling, it’s a heart thing. Remember to revel in those moments. Watching them grow and learn is amazing. Learning proper verbiage is also important, but I simply couldn’t bring myself to correct a few select words that were spoken so adorably in the incorrect version.

There is no greater source of joy and laughter then children (except for maybe an all expenses paid cruise to the Caribbean.) Potty training is the greatest, especially when it is successfully completed. One evening I recall my youngest hopping on the potty to take care of business and managing to fall in. Rushing to see what all of the yelling was about I ran into the restroom and quickly stepped back into the hall trying desperately to conceal my laughter. The sight of nothing but arms and legs flailing out of the top of the toilet was like some comical science fiction flick. To avoid scarring the child for life, containing myself was essential before the rescue. Another time, after successful completion of the above mentioned topic they felt the need to share the news. I dialed grandma and grandpa’s number and handed over the phone. What occurred next is forever firmly tucked away in my minds eye. They took the phone and proudly said “look at this, I did it.” Next proceeded to run down the hallway and shove the phone in the toilet to show them. Moments to revel in are gone in a flash.

Being an only child I can only watch and learn in wide eyed wonder as the years go by about the interaction of sibling children. Does the youngest one just pop out able to expertly and precisely push the buttons of the elder one(s)? Picture it, two children in two car seats in the backseat of one car, keep in mind that neither are old enough to speak many words. The youngest calmly and slowly turned they’re head slightly towards the other and said “baby” in a quiet voice. The response: clenched fists, red face and screaming “I not a baby”. As the situation quiets down, the youngest repeats the process once again slowly, quietly and methodically. The response continues to be the same. The entire situation repeats until the laughter in the front of the car can be contained to the point of being able to stop the cycle. The moments come and go, but the memories remain, revel in them.

Children will be children and kids are kids. Siblings will argue and dispute one another until the end of time. They are the most precious wonders. (Maybe the eighth wonder of the world.) But they are expensive, exhausting, stressful and frustrating. Still there is nothing fiscal or otherwise that would ever cause me to trade even one second of the entire experience. Remember through it all, from the diapers to running and paying for the activities, sports, dance or whatever, there is no experience more rewarding on this earthly plane. If you ever find yourself, and we all do from time to time, ready to trade them all in at the used child store or they are feverously jumping up and down on your last nerve, even on your seemingly worst day, remember this. Stop for an instant and take a deep breath. Then immerse yourself for a moment with what life would really be like without them. This helps to negate and take away the frustration of the moment. It puts perspective on the focus. Any parent would give anything for just one more of even the worst day over no more days with them at all. Revel in the joy of children, don’t regret missing it. Time goes by so very quickly.

Kids, are you kidding?

WAYS TO REVEL!

Ways to Revel!

In the coming blah, blah, blogs right here, you’ll find some tips, tricks and suggestions as to how to ward off the oinker boinkers, love your family on the most stressful (which is everyday with kids) days. Revel in the (non-stop) stress. Revel in the career (more likely a J.O.B.) you adore. Revel in the perfect (doubt it) home and neighborhood you reside in.

Don’t take all of this pessimism (realism) the wrong way. No doubt some and maybe many of you are very content with some of the afore mentioned areas of life, but it is HIGHLY unlikely that the majority of people are completely content with ALL of these areas of life. If you think you are one of the lucky ones it is quite possible that you are kidding yourself. Good tidings and best wishes to all!

Ways to Revel!

RETAIL THEFT COSTS US ALL

Retail Theft Costs Us All

One day I found an empty box that had contained a keychain stating # 1 Mom. Wow, wouldn’t it be great to know that you had raised a child to not only think of stealing as O.K. but the proud Mom wasn’t even worth the $1.07 (tax included) for a gift. How sad some people are!

Why do stores have to implement cameras. Do you think it's just for fun photo's? What about theft tags on products? The expense of the specialized registers and posts at the doors that detect the theft tags, those cost extra too. The people hired to watch the cameras or deal with people caught in the act. More money out of our pockets.

What do you think the additional expenses ends up impacting? Believe it or not, business don't just put out the expense out of the goodness of their hearts. It's added to the cost of the products we all purchase. The thoughtless and poorly intentioned oinker boinker actions of others continue to impact us all. How Rude! Unless you are one of the Oinker Boinkers that believes these actions to be acceptable, in which case, you will get your due one day even if you never physically caught.

Some things just don't pay and it's a game that shouldn't be paid.

Retail Theft Costs Us All

HUMOROUS HELPS

Humorous Helps

The Oinker Boinkers of the world can truly bring a person down without some resistance mechanisms. I ran across this article listed on Articlecity and felt it had some vital points to share. I agree with much of the information in the article. Unfortunately, the perfect world is not where the majority of us reside. Few companies are likely to consider implementing these suggestions. The hope here is that maybe we can all take away some helpful points that may have some positive and beneficial effects on our lives. Live happy and be well!

"Laugh and the Work World Laughs With You by: Craig Harrison
Many of today's work environments are rife with moody bosses and co-workers,
repetitive tasks and unpredictable market pressures. Stress abounds. Managers
often tell me they can’t afford the time or cost for my humor workshops; how can
they afford not to address workplace stress. We know clinically that laughter
and play have medicinal qualities, offering physical, psychological and
physiological benefits as well. In the workplace, humor and fun can increase
productivity, encourage creativity, enhance team building, and thus improve
esprit de corps. While we may not be able to control everything that happens to
us in our jobs and work environments, we do have control over how we choose to
react. I coach others how to create an environment which is safe and friendly,
and use humor to help maintain a healthy balance between the pressure and
seriousness which comes from high stakes jobs and a competitive marketplace.
Remember that humor starts from within. Being able to laugh at your own foibles
goes a long way toward creating a healthy work climate in which to flourish. The
following are activities and strategies for you as individuals, workgroups and
managers. Be creative and use these ideas to stimulate your own remedies to
workplace stress. - Adorn your work area with cartoons, headlines or funny
photos which bring a smile to your face and visiting co-workers'. Whether you're
surrounded by your favorite Pez dispensers childhood, or wry cartoons that speak
to your tastes, let your work area comfort and humor you while taking some of
the edge off the standard office decor. - Tap a co-worker to be your
humor-partner. Bring a daily joke to share. Commiserate about funny workplace
events. Keep each other buoyed with good cheer. When the chips are down your
humor partner can chip away at your depression, and vice versa. - Don't think
cubicles limit your humor options. I've seen shower curtains, umbrellas and
other devices used effectively to set a light or semi-serious tone. For some,
creativity flourishes behind their cubicle's shower curtain. People tampering
with your work area? Don't get angry…protect it with yellow "Crime Scene" tape!
- Subscribe to a humor website to be e-mailed a free daily or weekly humorous
story, joke and anecdote. Sites such as www.netfunny.com/rhf/ or
www.oraclehumor.com/ are two examples. Are You Laughin' At Me? One manager,
known for his moodiness, acknowledged it with a "Mood-O-Meter" outside his door.
Both he and his employees took turns forecasting his mood: from fire-breathing
to variable clouds to periodic eruptions…proceed at your own risk. Don't
underestimate the power of self-effacing humor for making yourself more
accessible and liked. Room for Laughter. Some companies designate a room, work
area or corner of their office as a romper room, where frolicking and silliness
is allowed. Whether yours has a punching bag, games, a dartboard or foosball,
it's a room for letting off steam and taking a break from the grind. Whine Not.
Everyone loathes whiners yet we all need to blow off steam periodically. One
group of creative trainers and their manager decreed Thursdays to be effective
whining days. They self-policed themselves the rest of the week, making sure not
to whine. Yet even their Thursday gripes had a departmental sanction and somehow
seemed healthier. After all, they belly ached together. A ripple effect actually
improved the morale of departments adjacent to theirs! Meting Out Humor. Many
professionals approach meetings with trepidation. A dash of humor can make a
difference. For regular meetings earmark one or two minutes each meeting for a
humorous interlude. In one workgroup a "humor hand" rotates from meeting to
meeting. Employees take turns setting a lighter tone to the meeting, insuring
everybody is engaged. An anecdote, verbal or physical activity focuses the group
on the task at hand and brings colleagues together in a spirit of fun. When not
to use Humor. Not all humor is good humor. Humor that hurts, ostracizes or is
cruel will have a detrimental effect on others and you. Strive for humor that is
inclusive, creative and captures our human essence. By now you know that sexist,
racist, ageist jokes and crude humor are not only inappropriate, but can lead to
sanctions, termination or even lawsuits. Be sensitive when telling jokes
involving terminations, reductions in force (RIFs) and personal tragedies. Their
hurt can linger long after the fact. . When in doubt…leave it out! Appropriate
humor can make hard tasks easier, collaborations fun and certainly make workdays
go faster. Laugh, and the work world laughs with you!
About The Author
Since the age of eleven when he went door-to-door selling Used Jokes, Craig
Harrison has been connecting with customers through humor. As a professional
speaker and corporate trainer Craig Harrison's Expressions of Excellence
provides sales and service solutions through speaking. Contact him at (888)
450-0664, through his website http://www.ExpressionsofExcellence.com
or via e-mail: humor@craigspeaks.com "

Humorous Helps

WHAT A GLORIOUS DAY

What a Glorious Day

There are challenges everywhere, everyday. We deal with stress, strife and frustrations, issues and aggravations, people and situational oinker boinkers, oinking and boinking us from every which direction. Do you ever feel like a rope is tied tightly to your ankle and a pack of wild horses are dragging you through life. Being bumped, cut and scraped along the way with no known means to stop it. (My, that is a vivid, cheerful image) It sometimes seems every moment of every day is filled with responsibilities, obligation, bills, taxes and things that must be done.

Now that your day has been brightened and you’re feeling cheerful, honestly though, the intent of this verbiage wasn’t to bring you down. The point to be made here is we aren’t alone even though it often times feels that way. There are blessings and joys each day as well. We just need to stop the mental wild ride just long enough each day to realize it. There is beauty in every day as well, although a conscious effort to notice is essential.

Finding humor in life’s challenges and a continuous balance can make all the days not just tolerable but enjoyable. If balance is lacking in your life
Click Here!. This is a great site with many options that may be beneficial or at least peaceful, fun and entertaining. Here is another site I like because it costs nothing, and may gain you some cash. I know, schemes and misleading individuals always trying to get rich off your money. I just like this site because really costs nothing to sign up. If nothing comes of it the loss is $0. I see no harm in that. If interested in getting the information Go Here!

Have a great and glorious day.

What a Glorious Day

PIGS ARE PEOPLE TOO!

Pigs Are People Too!!?
Obviously pigs are not people but as a metaphor they are. As the numerous examples in my article on retail express, the attitudes and behaviors of many people today represent a gross lack of concern for others and in turn themselves. How did we get here from the more respectful days of yesteryear?

At Christmas time (in the Department Store) it was discovered that a child had torn apart a package of markers and proceeded to draw on tablets of paper, other products, the shelves, walls and floor. I would assume it to be a young child or they would have known better. If that was the case, what type of parent leaves a young child alone long enough to create such destruction?

If the truth be known pigs are in fact tidy creatures. They may wallow in the muck and mud but they watch out for one another. They can even be a pet in ones home and trained to use a litter box. Maybe these Oinker Boinkers need to experience some time with the pigs to learn some more tolerable manors.

Pigs are people too.

REAL WORLD RETAIL OINK-ABILITY FACTOR

REAL WORLD RETAIL OINK-ABILITY FACTOR

(Oinker Boinker or Saintly Shopper)

People simply don’t realize the financial impact of the “O” factor on all retail shoppers. Every single day overworked under paid retail workers are forced to clean up after the shopping population’s messes. This, my friend, would be considered the oink-ability factor. Envision it on a scale of 1 to 10 with post hurricane force remains ending the day around 25. Although the percentage of mass chaotic mess makers is most likely small, the impact to all is unbelievably large!

If you should be particularly fond of the actual critter, the pig, please don’t be offended, as they are meant no actual criticism. I myself am very fond of the actual mud bathing oinkers; it is merely a reference to intrigue state of mind.

Do you realize, as consumers, we all pay the price for these thoughtless shoppers? This is not meant to step on the toes of job security, yet simply stated, half of all retail employees wouldn’t be required with out the clutter culture. The opportunity taken by those choosing to drop, throw, stuff, hide and destroy items cause us all to pay significantly over time.

Would it really be such an unthinkable thought, once finished trying on clothes which don’t fit or simply look better on the hanger, to carry them out of the changing room? Seeing as there is only one way in and out it’s a fair assumption they are headed that direction anyway. To help diminish the woe of consumers everywhere the item(s) could easily be hung in the locale retail store so conveniently establish near the changing room entrance/exit. I’m just not convinced it’s essential to drop the articles on the floor and stand on them while getting redressed. Do people really live like this at home? Do these people walk in from work, fling one shoe in the kitchen and hurl the other into the garage. Subsequently, take off another item and drop it in the toilet and so on?

Another breed that deserves honorable mention is the more courteous shoppers who never consider dropping and stepping on clothes. They don’t stop at the clothes return area. They, with determination and good will, put things away, on the wrong rack, in the wrong department, but they put them away. Frequently, the fortunate rejected garments, as if on a fantasy vacation to a land far, far away, end up in places they never before dreamed of. Some on dishes or near a child’s toy or even under a comfy comforter, the possibilities are endless. This way the employees don’t just get to return them, they get to find them first. How fun!

Moving on to another “O” Factor sampling, consider sheets and bedding. It’s certainly understandable wanting to zip open a package of 1000 thread count sheets. Who wouldn’t want to experience what 1000 threads per square inch of material feels like. The questionable concerns’, being is it really obligatory to take the set completely out, toss it on the floor and proceed to run them over with the cart as they wheel away?

Here’s how these oinker’s pick your pocket. Let’s say you find a great fitting pair of jeans priced $39.99 on sale for $24.99, great deal, huh? Not really when you consider the cost broken down. Start with the piece cost of $3.50, add another $1.00 for shipping and freight (now that gas prices are so exceptionally economical). The remaining $20.49 will be profit after expenses. Although it looks pretty darn good, a percentage goes towards paying for the lease, utilities, advertising, salaries, benefits etc., yet also has to cover theft and the oink-ability factor.

These are mostly essential expenses of retail business’ operations however; let me explain the oink-ability factors impact on you, the consumers. Let’s say only $2.00 of the profit margin goes towards paying the salaries, benefits and expenses of the extra people vital to cleaning up after these muck mired mess makers day after day. That converts to 9.77%. Given an average monthly retail spending amount of $550.00 per household (bearing in mind some people have very little money while others have a great deal) these rude and messy individuals cost you roughly $53.74 per month! This in turn equals $644.82 per year. Personally, I could find a better use for the cash, couldn’t you? So, the next time you’re overwhelmed by the urge to increase the oink-ability factor, just back off and think twice about your harmful impact on we, the saintly shoppers.

Comments and replies to this article are most welcome. Are you an Oinker-Boinker or a saintly shopper

Disclaimer: Figures in this article are hypothetical in nature hoping to open the closed minds of the messy. Who knows, if this becomes a really popular movement, maybe we can all save some money and start another much needed organization, called Neat And Gleaming Against Poorly Instructed Goofs or N.A.G.A.P.I.G.

No actual criticism is intended towards the true pig population.

Real World Retail Oink-ability Factor